It's A Father Thing
by acomplexgirlwithsimpletastes
Summary: Lily was my little girl. But all fathers know the day will come when their little girl will have to be given away. I just wonder how I didn't see it.
1. Chapter 1

For Papa --- I'm proud to be a daddy's girl.

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It's A Father Thing

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Chapter One: What Fathers Will Understand

Fathers will understand where I am coming from. There is just something about their little girls that captivate them and hold them captive for the rest of their lives. The process goes something like this.

Lily was being cradled in her mother's arms when she opened her eyes. And once she did, I was hers. No fuss, no complains, no nothing. Just a flash of your daughter's eyes and you, old man, are a goner. I know I was.

When she turned three and started running around the house --- stumbling, actually --- and ruining the expensive gadgets, vases and various family heirlooms I thought I was so clever to place here and there, I attempt to get mad at her. But she pouted with her bottom lip protruding and looked at me with pitiful green eyes, and I can't. Could you?

Then she's seven and she asks for a bedtime story. I try to explain that her mother is really the best one to ask for all this story telling business. I tried to tell her a fairy tale, but my version went something like this: "Once upon time, there was a princess. She grew up and married a prince. They lived happily ever after." She would shake her head at me and tell me to tell her a real story. I can't say no, so I tell her about guns. She seems to enjoy this and I know I enjoy that she enjoys it. Wouldn't you?

She's ten and she's going to school. She is. And she's growing to become a lady. I can see it and anyone who isn't blind can see that her red hair sparkles in the sun and her green eyes are bright and inquisitive. Then one day she comes home and looks at me with confused eyes, saying that she was asked out today. I panic. I have no idea what to do. But she looks at me fondly and says, "Daddy, I said no." But I wonder when the day will come that she will say yes. Haven't you?

Then she was off to a boarding school for witches and wizards and I was thrilled for her, because she was happy. She was ecstatic and she wrote me with letters that always began, _Daddy and Mommy, guess what…_ She wrote often and told us tales, about this and that and everything. I longed for those letters, because they were filled with stories. Her mother and I grinned as we heard about her stories, imagining her animated expression as she told it to us. We thought about her every day. What parent wouldn't?

But she sent me a letter which sent me into a frenzy of panic. Panic which nearly choked me alive. Lily had a boyfriend. My little girl, my precious little girl had a boyfriend. A part of me was snarling, thinking wait until I get my hands on that boy, while another part was crying that she was growing up so fast. But neither part was the part that wrote the letter that told her I was happy for her. His name was Henry. I hated Henry. You think about a boy kissing your baby girl. You would get mad, too. I did.

She wrote often, about Henry, then Henry turned to Tommy when she was fourteen, and I'm pretty sure that there was an Isaac and David shoved somewhere in those letters. I made my disdain for her boyfriends known, although I never imposed. While I disliked them, I didn't honestly think they would last. I was waiting for The One. It was father's intuition that told me, even if I had never met any of them before, that they weren't The One. The One who would take my little girl away. Years passed and she was seventeen. That was when I met The One.

She brought him home for Christmas.

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James Potter. He was in those letters too. He was the one who made my daughter see red. I found him amusing, to be honest, when Lily wrote about him, even when she described him with the most scathing words imaginable. She cursed and cussed and said that he was an abomination to mankind. I wrote back telling her to calm down, that that Potter boy was just too smitten. She wrote me a long letter on how she was just a conquest to him. I grinned, amused to the extreme. Who wouldn't be?

Now that I think about it, when Henry changed to Tommy and Isaac and David and who knows else was inserted in Lily's letters, James was always there. She referred to him as that Potter, of course. But that Potter was a constant in Lily's life, in Lily's letters and when I look back I shake my head and wonder how I never saw that he was The One.

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_Dear Daddy and Mommy,_

_Guess what? Okay, it sounds dumb. I sound like a five year old coming to tell you about a worm I saw, instead of a fifteen year old writing home. But it's just tradition, as you well know, to say that._

_School's fine, classes are getting more difficult as we are preparing for our O.W.L.S. The classes are more comprehensive and the teachers are bearing down on all of us. Professor McGonnagal actually wants us to be able to transfigure a pot into a living breathing animal. I'm not exactly having much luck with that --- my animal ended up being a pot that had ears, eyes and a tail. Not at all the baby dragon I was hoping for. Just kidding. Well, about the dragon part, everything else is just fact._

_I have a boyfriend. Isaac Hamilton --- he's a Ravenclaw, really smart. Dad, I think you'd like him. Mum… I think you would respect him. How's that? He's really nice, treats me like a princess. Emma says I'm so lucky, Isaac just spoils me. I have to agree._

_James Potter is annoying me again. And don't tell me that you don't remember him. He's that git. He struts the hallways like he owns them, he never actually tries to succeed in anything, but to my dismay he does, and he actually has his own fan club of girls dying to date him. What I can't help but think about is that if he has so many girls on his end then why does he have to keep bugging me? Waste of perfectly good air, I tell you. He just makes my blood boil by just standing there._

_Anyway, much love to both of you, say hi to Petunia for me and I hope that all is well._

_Write soon,_

_Your Lily_

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Dear Lily,

Guess what? It doesn't sound dumb, dear, it sounds cute.

Why would you want to transfigure a pot into a dragon? Why can't you just use a pot for cooking the way it's meant to me be and buy a dragon? Or whatever animal you need at the time.

I'm glad --- **I am not glad** --- forget what your father said about that, that you have a boyfriend again, Tommy wasn't nearly good enough for you. I have a vague idea by what you mean by me respecting Isaac, but you remind him not to get fresh with you --- **or else I'll kill him if he does, you hear** --- ignore him.

Ignore that Potter, he sounds like trouble, but you --- **you ought to give him a chance, he sounds amusi** --- ignore him. Just try to be patient and kind, Lily, you know how some people are. We love you and Petunia says hi.

Mum and **Dad**

**P.S. Don't ignore that Potter, he sounds like** --- stop bugging her, Jake. We love you, dear.


	2. Chapter 2

I don't own anything from Harry Potter, except for the plot.

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It's A Father Thing

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Chapter Two: What Fathers Will Give Away

Lily was seventeen and coming home for Christmas. I was sitting happily, waiting for Lily to come home with her mother, for she was picking her up from the station when the doorbell rang.

"Lily," I said happily, opening the door, seeing her red hair and hugging her. "It's good to have you home."

She grinned at me exuberantly and that was the precise moment that I noticed… him. He was taller than I was, maybe 6'2, lean, with a mop of jet black hair and hazel eyes under glasses --- hazel eyes which were looking at me. He was moderately handsome; I suppose… well, he was extremely good looking. But not nearly good enough for my daughter.

"Dad," Lily said, almost nervously, "this is James. James Potter."

"Hello sir," he greeted. He got points for that. Politeness always did. "It's nice to meet you."

I tore my gaze away from James' slowly, to meet her green eyes. "James Potter." I swallowed. "Well, come in, boy. We've got a lot to talk about." I don't think he missed the implication beneath my words. His hazel eyes flashed from my daughter's face to mine and he looked like he was enjoying it. Well, we would see.

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James Potter was helpful. He carried all the bags for the girls and brought them to the rooms, thanking us profusely for our hospitality. Lily was always at his side, alert, knowing that I would pounce on him the first chance I got. I wasn't surprised. This was the first boy she had ever brought home.

He was charming, he had charmed Hannah already. He was smart and had read the newspaper, talking about current events and such. I talked with him and found that he was witty and had a hint of a sarcastic sense of humor. He would be able to keep up with Lily, at least. He had excellent grades, he and Lily told us about it over dinner, how Lily tried to beat him and how he tried to beat Lily.

They talked about Lily's friends --- Emmeline Vance and Alice Prewett, nice girls, and his friends --- Sirius Black, Remus Lupin and Peter Something. They laughed as they told us anecdotes, finishing each other's sentences and thought processes.

I shot Hannah a panicked glance over the table while she merely grinned back. She knew this day was coming. I did, too, but I had hoped to delay at soon as possible.

He ate a lot, complimenting Hannah on her cooking, and helped bring out the dishes when we were done with dinner. He was always courteous and kind and when Petunia came home, stopped in her tracks and asked him who the hell he was, he responded kindly before I could even intervene, almost calming Petunia down. That impressed me.

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Lily cornered me after dinner.

"Daddy," she said, holding my hand, much like the way she used to when she was a child, tugging me into the family room. "Daddy, I'm sorry."

I shook my head at her. "Lily, why didn't you tell me?"

"Well," she said, shaking her head, "I don't know, exactly. But… it… it changed. It just did! I didn't even see it coming, dad."

"Explain." We sat on the couch, James and Hannah out of sight, probably somewhere in the kitchen.

She sighed, leaning her head on my shoulder. "James was different."

"James --- not Potter?" I said ruefully.

"No," she whispered firmly. "Not Potter."

"Well, go on."

"He changed. And I didn't even try to understand anymore. But he was Head Boy, and I was Head Girl and we spent a lot of time together… and then I began to see the real James." She paused for awhile. "He makes me laugh, dad, even when I'm really feeling low and he helped me through things. He made me happy and I began to look forward to our rounds together." She stopped again.

"We talked about stuff, we argued sometimes, but not like what we used to… He likes Chess, dad. Can you believe that? James Potter likes Chess. And he plays the piano. Not much, but a little. He sometimes just sits in a place for hours, thinking. He's… something else, dad. Something… more. I didn't see it. Maybe I chose not to see it.

"He understands me. He knows my moods. He knows how to handle me and what he doesn't know, he just accepts. He actually stayed beside me all through the night, once, just because I told him I felt sad. He didn't say anything --- he just… sat beside me. And it was enough.

"I don't know how or when… or why, even. But somewhere in these few months, I started to like him. Then it was easy." She was still speaking softly. "It was easy to say yes, when he asked me --- hesitantly – hesitantly! James Potter asked me hesitantly," she chuckled, "to go to Hogsmeade. And I said yes. The buzz started, but odd enough, I didn't care.

"Then we became… boyfriend… and girlfriend, and Emma and Alice and Dorcas accepted it, even were enthusiastic about it, dad. Emma actually told me that 'it was about high time'." She sounded indignant, then, before her voice became wistful again. "And here we are."

The whole time she had been talking, my heart had clenched and unclenched, at the same time, I was happy for her, but nervous, because… he was it, wasn't he? He had taken Lily, just like that. I knew he was it and I wonder how I never realized it before.

"So, please, daddy," she said, turning to me suddenly, "give him a chance."

"I'll try."

"Daddy!"

"Oh, alright," I grumbled. "I will. How's that?"

"Much better," she beamed.

Humph. He'll have to pass my test first.

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It was the next morning that I finally got to talk to him.

"Lily," Hannah said, beckoning with her eyes, "come with me in the kitchen for a moment."

As they backed away, they shot me pleading glances. Glances that clearly said, _Give him a chance_. Lily's green eyes looked especially pleading.

I nodded at the chair in front of me and he sat down. I sat down, too and scrutinized him. "Let's be honest here."

"I like honesty." Blunt. He got points for that, too.

"You're not good enough for my daughter," I informed him.

He looked almost apologetic. "I know sir." He paused. "But is anyone?"

Potter had a good point. I leaned back into my chair and pressed the tips of my fingers together. "She's written about you."

"I'm sure she has. I'm also sure it was full of complaints." His hazel eyes looked amused.

"She hated you."

"She did."

"She said she was just a conquest to you."

He looked almost angry. "Lily was never a conquest to me."

"But she thought so, didn't she?"

"Yes, she did, sir." He had never flinched away from my glance during this conversation. Point for Potter.

"And how did that change?"

He hesitated. "Persistence and a change of ways."

"You love her." It was clear to me. Whether or not Lily knew wasn't that point at the moment, because it was clear in his eyes that he did. He worshipped the very ground she walked on. Another point for Potter.

"Yes, sir." The look in his eyes softened to something that resembled adoration. He wasn't looking at me anymore, he had taken to staring at his hands.

But he had already won me over. It was a father's privilege to have a daughter, especially to have one as wonderful as Lily. But it was also part of being a father to know that one day you will have to give your daughter away. Lily had chosen well. He wasn't perfect, but who was, and he loved Lily, so who was I to get in the way? And by the way Lily had been acting, it was clear that she loved James, too. Although I had no intention of telling anyone that. "James."

He looked up, his gaze questioning.

"Take care of her." It was a soft order, almost asking, because it wasn't honestly in my hands anymore. I knew, you see, that he was The One. It was as if I was already bracing myself for the day that I would, truly, give her away.

He looked at me and smiled. We shared something. We already had something in common the moment he stepped into my house. He loved Lily. I loved Lily. And that love would be enough to bind us together.

"I will."

"Promise me."

"I promise."

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_Dear Daddy and Mommy,_

_Guess what? James can't stop talking about you. Dad, you really made an impression on him. What on earth did you say? Mum, he loves your cooking and he wants more of your cookies. With the bottomless pit that is his stomach, he always needs food._

_I know you were both surprised. Dad, maybe more than mum. I always said I didn't like him and I never imagined things would end up like this --- it's hard to explain._

_James changed this year. He changed and became… better. He's not arrogant anymore and he's not a bully. He's nice, he tutors younger students, he's Head Boy… he changed. And somewhere in the process, I didn't forget the old James, I just learned to forgive him and love the new James. Yes, I love him._

_Hard to believe, isn't it? But I do love him. He makes me happy, so happy that at times I feel like I'm floating on air. He makes me laugh and he's there for me when I cry. He really takes care of me and is always there for me when I need him or want him, even when I don't want him there, he is. I just… I don't know. But I love him and I'm not sure if it's enough, but I do. And for now, I'm happy._

_I love you both so much and --- James sends his love._

_Always,_

_Your Lily_

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Dear Lily,

You love him, you love him, you really, really love him. I just felt like teasing you, dear, for a moment there I was transported back to fifth grade. I'm glad James is there for you, he seems like a fine young man. I'm handing the letter over to your father, I have to go run some errands, I love you dear and send James my love.

**All this talk about love is nauseating. **

**I'm pulling your leg. Lily… I'm happy for you. James seems to adore the ground on which you walk and tell me --- was I not right about 'that Potter' being amusing? Your mother and you will now have to eat your words. I love you dear, and tell James to make good on his promise, although from what you say, he already is. Trustworthy, that one.**

**I love you and write often,**

**Dad and Mum**

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	3. Chapter 3

I actually asked my own dad about this, asked him how it felt for him, watching us grow up. He didn't even answer me, he just smiled and told me that I'd figure it out eventually. Him and his mysterious qualities.

Thanks for the reviews and obviously, I don't own Harry Potter.

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Chapter 3: What Fathers Know 

Lily was graduating.

We were all invited to Hogwarts and we saw her go up the stage when her name was called. She looked beautiful that day, practically glowing with her cheeks were flushed, green eyes bright and red hair stunning. I couldn't believe that my youngest daughter was graduating already. As my eyes wandered the stage, I saw another man who had the same look of stunned amazement that I did.

James Potter was staring at my daughter, staring at her with so much love I was startled. He looked adoring, he always did when Lily came around but he hid it well. He hid it under a mask. I knew, more than ever, that he would ask me soon. He would ask me to give my daughter away. Soon.

He did. It was during the Graduation party, when Lily had taken Hannah to meet some more of her friends and I was staring off into space.

He appeared from nowhere. That kid seemed to do that a lot.

"Hello, sir."

"Hello, James. Congratulations. Nice speech." He had given a speech, as Head Boy or something to that effect. The only line I remembered was the beginning line, for it had given me so much to ponder on. _Seconds tick, minutes flicker, hours pass, days are spent and years are accomplished. Somehow, in the blink of an eye, we have finished seven years together --- although the time spent seems so short. But we will not forget. _

How was it that time had flown by so fast? She was a little girl in pigtails, I remember. She was. She used to run around the backyard with her sister, smelling daisies. How is it that she is now a grown woman, standing before me?

He grinned at me and somehow I found myself smiling back, despite the reverie that I was in. "Lily helped."

"I thought so."

Silence for awhile as we contemplated what to do next.

"Mr. Evans," James said smoothly, suddenly, staring at me, "I want to ask you something."

Cold fear gripped me. _No._ "Go ahead, James." _Lily loves him._

He almost seemed to hesitate, but he plowed right ahead. "I want to ask you for Lily's hand in marriage."

I swallow. Again. And again. Then I stare of into the sunset, the feeling of loss taking over all other things. I couldn't see the idea of giving her away --- all that crap about not losing a daughter, only gaining a son and a family expanding and growing wasn't any comfort to a father being faced with giving his daughter away.

_Lily loves him._ "Take care of her." _She loves him. _

"Yes, sir." His eyes cannot contain his relief and delight, his ecstasy. _He loves her._

I nod and he understands, or at least I think he does, for as he walks away, his hand touches my shoulder, comforting and reassuring. He doesn't say anything, because what can he say? I turn around and watch the sun set.

"Daddy," Lily cried, running towards me. She threw her arms around me and it occurred to me that I had never seen so happy. I knew that I had made the right choice. I knew that James was going to take care of her.

He better.

I don't have a shotgun in my closet for nothing.

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Dear Daddy and Mommy,

Guess what? We set the date! I feel like I'm floating. That's how strange this seems. It's like I'm living someone else's life, like I don't have the right to be this happy. I'm not sure of what I'm doing, because all I know right now is that I love James. I love him so much it's like it consumes all of me. I don't even know if that makes sense but sometimes I feel like nothing makes sense anymore.

We're visiting you next week and James is bringing his parents. Greg and Anna are really nice people. They have James' warmth and Greg has James' eyes, or maybe it's the other way around, I don't know. Is this what love feels like? Like you don't know anything anymore? Because I think I'm going crazy --- but in a good way. But heaven help me, because I don't know how you can be crazy in a good way. I love him so much, I just do and I don't know much anymore except for that. He's all I know. This letter is probably just my rambling, but dad, mum, I am just so happy. I feel like… like I've never ever been this happy and all it takes is that James is there.

I don't know anymore, I'm confused and happy, but know that I will always love you. Always.

We send all our love.

Lily and James

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Dear Lily and James,

Guess what? We love you both. **Be happy; you deserve it.**

Mum and **Dad**


	4. Chapter 4

This is probably the final chapter, although I might post one last chapter. Enjoy. And Merry Christmas. Belated.

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Chapter 4: What Fathers Say and Remember

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"You look beautiful."

She smiles at me nervously as her hands fidget and as she stares, tapping her feet. She's so nervous she can hardly control herself. We are sitting outside the Church, sitting on the steps. She asked to go outside for awhile --- she needed a breath of air. I went with her --- just because.

"Lily," I say softly.

She turns to look at me.

"Do you love him?"

"Yes." No doubts.

"He loves you."

"Yes."

"Then you have nothing to worry about." I smile at her half-heartedly. She doesn't look any less nervous and I know what I have to say. I've had this speech prepped up since forever. I think all fathers do.

"He's The One, Lily. He is. James loves you and you love him. You both want it and I've never seen you so happy." I stop, thinking of the right words. "You're his, you know, the same way he's yours." I turn to grin at her, but it doesn't reach my eyes. "This isn't a mistake, this is love and it's just right to be nervous, although I'm warning you, I'm going to cry." I don' feel happy. I should feel happy, but I just feel a sense of remarkable loss.

"Dad," she whispered, reaching to hug me, her eyes brimming with tears. I hug her as if I'll never let her go. She is my little girl again, just for one moment, and I remember.

She grew up in a little house in the suburbs, she played with her older sister, she blew bubbles as a child, and she used to hate her red hair. She cried once when her doll broke, she went to a school for witches and wizards, she had three best friends, she had boyfriends, she was Head Girl and she graduated. She loves chocolate chip cookies, she hates oatmeal, she sometimes runs around fields for no reason and she adores sunflowers.

She hated a boy named Potter --- and she fell in love with a man named James.

She laughs, she loves and --- she lives.

"I love you," I whispered.

"Love you right back, dad," she whispered back.

Then the wedding march starts and someone opens the door for us, telling us to hurry inside. I love her, she loves me, she's in love --- it's enough. Not enough to comfort me fully, because I know I am losing her, but I can only accompany her on this journey, watch her from the sidelines. I can only let her go. I reared her, you know, I raised her. She'll be okay.

Fathers will understand, fathers will give away, fathers will know, fathers will cry, fathers will remember, fathers will understand.

It's a father thing, after all.

Butterfly Kisses

There's two things I know for sure:  
She was sent here from heaven and she's  
daddy's little girl.  
As I drop to my knees by her bed at night  
She talks to Jesus and I close my eyes and  
I thank god for all the joy in my life  
Oh, but most of all  
For butterfly kisses after bedtime prayer;  
sticking little white flowers all up in her  
hair; "Walk beside the pony, Daddy, it's my first ride."  
"I know the cake looks funny, Daddy, but I sure tried."  
In all that I've done wrong I know I must  
have done something right to deserve a hug  
every morning and butterfly kisses at night.

Sweet 16 today  
She's looking like her mama a little more everyday  
One part woman, the other part girl.  
To perfume and make-up from ribbons and curls  
Trying her wings out in a great big world.

But I remember  
Butterfly kisses after bedtime prayer; sticking  
little white flowers all up in her hair.  
"You know how much I love you, Daddy, But if you  
don't mind I'm only gonna kiss you on the cheek this time."  
With all that I've done wrong I must have done  
something right to deserve her love every morning  
and butterfly kisses at night.

All the precious time  
Like the wind, the years go by.  
Precious butterfly.  
Spread your wings and fly.

She'll change her name today.  
She'll make a promise and I'll give her away.  
Standing in the bride-room just staring at her.  
She asked me what I'm thinking and I said "I'm not  
sure-I just feel like I'm losing my baby girl."  
She leaned over...gave me butterfly kisses with her mama there,  
Sticking little white flowers all up in her hair  
"Walk my down the aisle, Daddy-it's just about time."  
"Does my wedding gown look pretty, Daddy? Daddy, don't cry!"

Oh, with all that I've done wrong I must have  
done something right.  
To deserve your love every morning and butterfly  
kisses-I couldn't ask God for more, man this is what love is.

I know I gotta let her go, but I'll always remember ---  
every hug in the morning and butterfly kisses…

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I tried my best, although as I am not a father, I don't know if I captured it right. But I tried. Tell me how I did, would you?


End file.
